Days like this makes me think a lot. 

Lately things have been so rough. With my grandpa’s passing, my grandma moving in, losing someone that once meant the whole world to me, fakes friends, but shit happens. But what got to me the most is when my grandpa passed.

 Ever since my grandpa passed away I haven’t  been able to be myself. I try not to let it show but i can only take so much. Seeing my grandma every morning not having a clue of whats going on or who anyone is, kills me a little inside. She just seems so lost without my grandpa. What kills me the most is when she asks where he is or why did he leave her. 

I just can’t imagine how my parents feel, especially my dad. I know this gets to him the most. I remember when we all found out when he first passed I was with my dad at work. At first it seemed like it didn’t matter to him. He just kept doing what he had to do to get his job done. But as soon as he got into the car, he broke down. Ive never seen my dad cry so hard. We were on our way to SF that day to see the fam.&the prayer service. That day was by far the worst day of my life. But it made me realize who was there when i absolutely needed them. My family has never been closer since then. But for this, i want to give props to my dad for being so strong through all of this and being so strong for the family. And to my family for being an AMAZING support system. 

Papa, Even though I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with you as much I wanted, the time I did spend with you and the memories I made with you, I will always cherish. Hopefully your watching me up there when I play my basketball games.Especially todays&thursdays game. Its probably the biggest games ever. But most of all watch over the family. I love you so much. And miss you more than you can imagine. RIP Papa<3 

Especially on Sundays. Then my day just consists of staying in, wrapped up in a blanky, eating, being lazy, and watching movies. And maybe do my homework. Lol. My faaaaaavorite!